Men are from Mars,women are from Venus
来源:百度文库 编辑:神马文学网 时间:2024/06/13 12:13:14
《男人从火星来 女人从金星来》简介
第一章 Chapter 1 Men Are from Mars Women Are from Venus 请想像男人从火星来、女人从金星来的景象。久远以前的某一天,火星人从天文望远镜中发现了金星人,仅只一瞥,就觉知与金星人素未相识, Imagine that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. One day long ago the Martians, looking through their telescopes, discovered the Venusians. Just glimpsing the Venusians awakened feelings they had never known. 但他们互相仰慕,火星人受邀做了一趟太空之旅,飞向金星。 They fell in love and quickly invented space travel and flew to Venus. 金星人展开双臂迎接火星人。他们会觉这天终将来到,心里充满了过去未曾有过的爱的感觉。 The Venusians welcomed the Martians with open arms. They had intuitively known that this day would come. Their hearts opened wide to a love they had never felt before. 金星人和火星人的爱情真不可思议,他们喜欢互相作伴、一起做事、一起分享。因为来自不同世界,他们显现了彼此的不同,不过他们花好几个月时间彼此学习、摸索,并感激双方各自有不同的需要、嗜好及行为模式。他们亲爱和谐地一起生活多年。 The love between the Venusians and Martians was magical. They delighted in being together, doing things together, and sharing together. Though from different worlds, they reveled in (took pleasure) their differences. They spent months learning about each other, exploring and appreciating their different needs, preferences, and behavior patterns. For years they lived together in love and harmony. 接着,他们决定飞向地球。刚开始住地球时,每件事都美好可爱,可是有天早上,每个人一醒来都得了独特的健忘症....选择健忘。 Then they decided to fly to Earth. In the beginning everything was wonderful and beautiful. But the effects of Earth's atmosphere took hold, and one morning everyone woke up with a peculiar kind of amnesia, selective amnesia! 火星人和金星人都忘了他们是从不同的星球来,本来就有差异,这天早上,他们过去互相学习的每一件不同的事情都从记忆里消失了,从这天开始,男人和女人便陷入了冲突。 Both the Martians and Venusians forgot that they were from different planets and were supposed to be different. In one morning everything they had learned about their differences was erased from their memory. And since that day men and women have been in conflict. 记住彼此的差异 REMEMBERING OUR DIFFERENCES 男人和女人因为没有警觉彼此应该有所不同,因此纷争不断。由于忘记彼此是不同的重要事实,我们常对异性生气或失望,我们期待异性和我们相像,希望他们“要的是我们所要的”及“以我们的方式去感受”。 Without the awareness that we are supposed to be different, men and women are at odds with each other. We usually become angry or frustrated with the opposite sex because we have forgotten this important truth. We expect the opposite sex to be more like ourselves. We desire them to "want what we want" and "feel the way we feel." 我们误以为如果配偶爱我们,他们必会以确定的方式反应和表达——如同当我们爱某些人时的反应与表达方式一般。这种想法使我们不断的感到失望,也阻碍我们花时间温柔地沟通彼此的不同。 We mistakenly assume that if our partners love us they will react and behave in certain ways ? the ways we react and behave when we love someone. This attitude sets us up to be disappointed again and again and it prevents us from taking the necessary time to communicate lovingly about our differences. 我们误以为知果配偶爱我们,他们必会以确定的方式来反应和表现——如同当我们爱某些人时的反应与表达方式一般。男人错误地期待女人要以男人的方式思考、沟通和反应;女人也错误地期待男人要以女人的方式去感觉、沟通和反应。我们都忘了男人和女人应该是不同的,结果我们的关系充满了不必要的摩擦与冲突。 Men mistakenly expect women to think, communicate, and react the way men do; women mistakenly expect men to feel, communicate, and respond the way women do. We have forgotten that men and women are supposed to be different. As a result, our relationships are filled with unnecessary friction (abrasion; discord) and conflict. 清楚认识和尊重这种差异,在与异性相处时,可大大地减少许多迷惑。你只要记得男人是从火星来、女人是从金星来的,每件事都可得到解释了。 Clearly recognizing and respecting these differences dramatically reduce confusion when dealing with the opposite sex. When you remember that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, everything can be explained. 概观男女的不同 AN OVERVIEW OF OUR DIFFERENCES 我将会在整本书中大量讨论男女的不同,每一章都有重要的新观念。以下要探讨的是男女的主要不同处。 Throughout this book I will discuss in great detail our differences. Each chapter will bring you new and crucial insights. Here are the major differences that we will explore: 第二章将探讨男人和女人天生的价值观是如何的不同,并尝试了解我们与异性相处时常犯的两大错误:男人错误地提供解答和无价值的感觉;女人错误地提供没有吸引力的忠告和指示。藉由了解火星和金星的背景,就可以清楚明了为何男人和女人会不知不觉地犯下这个错误。只要记住彼此的不同,就能修正错误,马上以更多样化的方式回应对方。 In chapter 2, we will explore how men's and women's values are inherently different and try to understand the two biggest mistakes we make in relating to the opposite sex: men mistakenly offer solutions and invalidate feelings while women offer unsolicited advice and direction. Through understanding our Martian/Venusian background it becomes obvious why men and women unknowingly make these mistakes. By remembering these differences we can correct our mistakes and immediately respond to each other in more productive ways. 第三章在于发觉男女处理压力的不同方式。火星人倾向解决问题和安静思考什么事使他们困扰,金星人本能地感到需要谈论让她们困扰的事。你会学到在解决冲突时所需的新策略。 In chapter 3, we'll discover the different ways men and women cope with stress. While Martians tend to pull away and silently think about what's bothering them, Venusians feel an instinctive need to talk about what's bothering them. You will learn new strategies for getting what you want at these conflicting times. 我们将在第四章探讨如何鼓舞异性。男人在感觉自己被需要时容易受到激发;女人则在感觉受珍爱时才会被激发。我们将讨论促进两性关系的三步骤,并探讨如何克服挑战:男人需要克服他们的吝于付出爱;女人需要克服她们的吝于接受爱。 We will explore how to motivate the opposite sex in chapter 4. Men are motivated when they feel needed while women are motivated when they feel cherished. We will discuss the three steps for improving relationships and explore how to overcome our greatest challenges: men need to overcome their resistance to giving love while women must overcome their resistance to receiving it. 第五章你将学习到,男女因使用不同语言而老是误解对方。“金星/火星措词辞典”能够翻译一般的误解用辞。你将学到男人和女人如何为了完全不同的理由说话及停止说话。女人将学到当男人停止说话时该怎么办?男人将学到为了不致失望,该如何成为更好的倾听者。 In chapter 5, you'll learn how men and women commonly misunderstand each other because they speak different languages. A Martian/Venusian Phrase Dictionary is provided to translate commonly misunderstood expressions. You will learn how men and women speak and even stop speaking for entirely different reasons. Women will learn what to do when a man stops talking, and men will learn how to listen better without becoming frustrated. 第六章你会发现男人和女人对亲热有何不同要求。男人亲密后必然需要抽离,女人会学到如何支持这个抽离的过程,以便使他像橡皮筋一样弹跳回来。女人也会学到与男人亲密谈话的最好时机。 In chapter 6, you will discover how men and women have different needs for intimacy. A man gets close but then inevitably needs to pull away. Women will learn how to support this pulling?away process so he will spring back to her like a rubber band. Women also will learn the best times for having intimate conversations with a man. 第七章探讨女人的爱情态度是如何的有周期性起伏,男人将学习如何正确判断女人偶尔的情感变化,及认识女人何时最需要关心,如何在女人情感起伏时有技巧地、不放弃地支持她们。 e will explore, in chapter 7, how a woman's loving attitudes rise and fall rhythmically in a wave motion. Men will learn how correctly to interpret these sometimes sudden shifts of feeling. Men also will learn to recognize when they are needed the most and how to be skillfully supportive at those times without having to make sacrifices.- 1
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