The 10 Deadliest Words and Phrases in Business

Here are the 10 phrases that I always either delete or find substitutes for as I review writing samples:

1. "Yours very truly" (also "Sincerely yours" and "Very truly yours"). You are not theirs. These closings are antiquated. I find myself using "Sincerely" almost all the time. 

2. "Respectfully"- This closing has a solemn, almost hat-in-hand aspect to it that Idislike. I see it used in denial letters all the time. Perhaps what thewriter is thinking is this: "If I use 'Respectfully,' it will softenthe blow." But, of course, it doesn't. It just adds a somber tone and won't make the reader any happier about having his or her claim denied.

3. "Please be advised ..."- A lawyer-like phrase that is almost always unnecessary. Usually youare not so much giving "advice" as you are "telling' or "informing."Save this phrase for the act of giving of advice. But no need to write:"Please be advised that the check is overdue." Simply write: "The checkis overdue." Instead of "I advised him to call me tomorrow," just write"I told [or asked] him to call me tomorrow." Maybe "told has a bit tooharsh a tone for some, in which case feel free to use this "advice" asneeded. But "advise" or "be advised" is almost always overkill.

4. "Kindly" - "Please" works better than this old fashioned word.

5. "I have forwarded..." "I am forwarding"- In e- mail, "forwarding" does have a specific meaning: the sending ofmaterials from someone other than the writer to the reader. In othercases (e.g., I am forwarding my business card to you), just use "send."

6. "Above-captioned" (also: "above referenced")-Any of these phrases tells the reader to stop reading, roll his eyesback to the "RE line," find the information, and then re-enter theletter to continue its reading. Wouldn't it be easier to just summarizethe salient information in the letter itself? In other words, if the"above-mentioned claim" refers to "Smith vs. Jones," why not write, "Inthe Smith vs. Jones claim..." Sometimes the "above" will refer to aclaim number. In this case, just put the claim number in the letteritself. The trick in writing is to keep the reader reading with as fewdistractions as possible. 

7. "Please do not hesitate to contact me."- I'll refrain from writing, "If I had a dollar for every time I seethis phrase used...." because then I'd be using a cliché to criticize acliché'! The prevalent "please do not hesitate" was a light, brightphrase when it was coined almost a half-century ago, but now, like mostclichés, it pays a price for its popularity. When you use a cliché, yousubtly send a message to your reader that you think in clichés. So,innocuous as this phrase may sound, it does portray its writer asblandly impersonal. Use: "please call me," polite with out the clichéconnection.

8. "Please note that..." Again, here's a phrase that may seem innocent but it has, for me, a rather schoolmarmishtone ( "Now, pay attention!") I'd omit the phrase.

9. "Enclosed please find."- This phrase, more than any other in the world of business writing,epitomizes the lawyer-like way people start to write when they areeither desperate to avoid using a pronoun like "I" or simply love torepeat phrases they've seen in other letters without ever thinking forthemselves. After all, what do you have to "find"?

Thatreminds me of a joke. A guy goes into a restaurant and orders a steakdinner. Later, the waiter walks over table, smiles obsequiously, andasks "How did you find your steak?" The guy looks at the waiter andsays, "I just moved the mashed potatoes--and there it was!"

When The Beatles were returning home after coming to the United States, a journalist asked them: "How did you find America?" Oneof the Fab Four answered, "We turned left at Greenland."

Enough said! There's nothing to "find." Use "enclosed is..." or "I'veenclosed."

10. "Under separate cover"- When you write, "I am sending you this "under separate cover," youare perpetuating a formalistic and old fashioned phrase. When I hearthe word "cover," I think of a big spaghetti pot and that reminds me to"boil down" the thought to read, "I am sending you it separately [or byFedEx, etc.]"

Ifyou see these phrases all the time, maybe it's time to train some ofyour people to sharpen their writing, to make sure it moves yourcompany forward. If you'd like to know how some companies are training their people to write more effectively, let me know!